1- you’ll eat alot of meat !
All Latino Christmas parties have more meat on the menu than an old school butcher shop. You have your roasted chickens and turkeys and, of course, pernil. If you’re lucky your family has a caja china to cook a succulent pig. And what’s more Christmassy than a full pig carcass on the dinner table…nada. Now eat up, it’s getting cold.
2- you’ll DANCE !
You know the signs. Your papi has had way too much Chivas Regal Whiskey. He’s eyeing your mom in a way you haven’t seen since, well, last Christmas. Then his favorite Los Tigres Del Norte jam comes on and he proceeds to take your mom for the dance of her life. You don’t want to read this but your dad is totally getting in your mom’s pants tonight.
3- you’ll get EDUCATED !
You have your Tio Jesús. And there’s your primo Chucho. Your pop is Manuel de Jesús. And, of course, you’ve gathered to celebrate the birth of Jesús Christ. Jesús! That’s a whole lotta Jesúses!
4- you’ll love the MUSICA !
Sure, we’ll play “Jingle Bells,” “O Christmas Tree,” “Joy to the World,” and other holiday favorites but it’s all about the tunes that’ll make you wanna move. Jose Feliciano’s “Feliz Navidad” is just the tip of the mofongo, Willie Colon and Hector Lavoe’s Asalto Navideño Vol. 1 and 2 are a staple in most Latino Christmas parties. RIP Yomo Toro!
5- You won’t hear Christmas carols, but you’ll hear salsa and merengue.
You’ll also be asked to dance by an uncle or grandpa, and your skills won’t be able to match theirs. No one’s skills will be able to match theirs, honestly, not even their wives’.
